Hello internet people. This may be the shortest blog post I ever write, but I felt it was important to add a little side note to my previous rant on Facebook (see two posts earlier).

About a week ago, I changed my Facebook relationship status from “single” to “in a relationship.” (Have you all died of shock?) Anyway, ever since that happened, I have gotten nothing but ads about private detectives and how to investigate cheaters and engagement rings. First off, those are some contradictory messages. Secondly… um, hi Facebook. It’s been a WEEK. Let’s calm down and make sure the two of us can actually stand one another long term before we jump to engagement rings and affairs, okay? Yeah. Facebook. It gets how the world works.

And the funniest part of all? Whenever my ads aren’t about weddings or affairs, they’re about becoming a firefighter. Related to my changing relationship status? Apparently so.